I've been searching for the right creative outlet, with my husband's upcoming (dun*dun*dun*) DEPLOYMENT... I really need some structured unwind time. Knitting, scrap booking, bow-making... these things all sound fun, but they just don't fit me. Have you ever been trying to vacuum your living room and the damn cord slips out of the wall outlet so you plug it back in and as soon as you get into a good rhythm it pops out again? That's the feeling I was getting from trying all these Craft ideas. Nothing was holding me tight enough. I need a good fit, something that has always interested me... and so here I am.
Writing is that perfect fit for me, the "ahhhh" moment. Like when you try on a new pair of jeans in a size smaller than you thought you were and that button fits through the hole and you're completely inside of them, not a single amount of that extra baby/winter/married weight sticking out of the top.. that's what writing does for me. So I hope that you'll follow me on this journey into new and uncharted territory, share some laughs and hopefully not too many tears along the way, but if anything I have a place now where I can just go and be ME.
I need that right now more than I've ever needed it before. I can put on a brave face and pretend that I'm not scared out of my stilettos, but I really am. I know my husband is well trained, I know he's surrounded by some really great men... but I also know that war is unpredictable and dangerous and that bad things happen to good soldiers.
A year without my husband is not going to be a walk in the park, we just got done with an eight month separation while he did his training, and that was hard enough. Now we're going to go through it with the uncertainty of war thrown in the mix. Having your husband gone when you have small children at home to take care of is a harrowing feat, add into it a new house, a new town, and your family thousands of miles away and its down right terrifying. I know I'm not the first one to go through this, and I am not under any illusion that I'm alone in what I'm feeling, but I thought maybe if I shared my experience with the world as it's happening, that somewhere out there some other wife might feel a little bit less alone. I've read a few military wife blogs and I find it comforting to read that other people are as in love with their husbands as I am.
I know that there are a lot of horrible statistics/stereotypes about military families and divorce rates, but that doesn't scare us one bit. We are in a committed, living, breathing, marriage. We work at it everyday, we take on each challenge as a team, and we WILL beat whatever comes our way. So don't worry about that, you can however say a prayer that my sanity doesn't take a major vacation while my husband is gone and my children are running wild!!
That's all for now, consider yourself Nicked. :)
No comments:
Post a Comment